Ancestral healing is a radical act against the forces, systems, and people that have hurt us deeply—the forces that have to tried to eradicate many of our cultures. Most continents have unfortunately been subjected to colonialism in one way or another, leaving many cultures at risk of losing their native languages, rituals, song, stories, and more. Ancestral healing is a radical act of pushing back to the narratives that have been thrust upon us. Some of our ancestors had their cultures stripped of them through aggressive tactics while others may have left certain parts of their cultures behind for fear of persecution.

When I work with clients on ancestral healing we look at two aspects of ancestral work:

1. Healing and breaking cycles that were thrust upon us from our ancestral lines

2. Reconnecting, honoring, and preserving our ancestral lineages

BEING A CYCLE BREAKER

Sometimes the people we love hurt us—sometimes the people that were supposed to protect us don’t actually protect us and instead inflict trauma upon us.  Emotional, physical, and sexual abuse are pervasive cycles that can permeate a lineage. People think they can ignore a problem and that the problem will resolve itself. The issues with this type of thinking is that abuse doesn’t just “go away”. Have you heard of the cliche “hurt people hurt people?” That is a cliche because it is a pervasive—meaning that an abused person is likely to abuse others if their abuse is left unhealed. Unhealed and suppressed trauma therefore may leave a greater cycle of unhealed trauma in its wake. As a therapist, I’ve seen people that are generations deep of being abused the same way their parents were, in the same way those parents were, in the same way their grandparents were. Abuse and unbroken cycles are parasitic. Therefore, being a cycle breaker is a radical act.

Being a cycle breaker is saying “you will no longer hurt me because I am not allowing you to abuse me anymore”. Being a cycle breaker is deciding how and why you give people access to you—it is saying “these are my boundaries” and staying true to how you allow people to treat you. Being a cycle breaker is saying “I will not allow this behavior to be normalized by myself anymore” and “I will not allow this behavior to be normalized for my children”. Being a cycle breaker is hard and that is what makes it radical—it’s radical because we are affecting the fundamental nature of a cycle that we are no longer willing to tolerate. By being a cycle breaker we heal the ancestral hurts that have been passed down and diminished—we reclaim our sovereignty and power. We breathe life into all of the ancestors that may have not had the privilege of leaving, breaking the cycle, and/or healing those cycles.

ETHICAL ANCESTOR REVERENCE

Ancestral reverence is a radical act of self acceptance and self love—a choosing of ourselves and our ancestors. By developing a deep spiritual practice where we give honor to our mixed linages we begin to heal where the ancestral lines were nearly broken and forgotten. Learning the language, the songs, the stories, crafting foods from the culture, and giving back to the ancestors is radical to the over cultures that tried to diminish our ways of being—the ways of being that kept our ancestors alive so we could all be here today. Ethically reconnecting and honoring the ancestry that created us is a form of preservation. Leading with reverence means not being an asshole and taking from the cultures. It is sitting in deep reciprocity—learning to give our love and gratitude to the ancestors before asking for their help. Think of the relationships with your ancestors like any other relationship in your life. Give them what you would like in return—treat others how you wish to be treated. The same principals apply to our ancestors. Learn to make the foods from their cultures with gratitude and love in your heart. Learn their language and speak it with love to pass onward to your decedents our of the greater preservation of those folk. Don’t just say you are apart of insert culture here—become a part of the culture and do it with deep respect.

Ethical ancestral reverence is the most rewarding spiritual work I have done in my life and is where I have seen some of the deepest healing within myself and others. Although, it is not a simple path that has text book steps set in front of you. Moreover, it deeply healing in ways only one can truly experience for words do not give the full breadth. Ethical ancestral reverence is radical in its subtext of “I will not let this culture die with the folk that have come before me and instead I will stand in the gift of life—the gift of cultures and ancestors I have been given”.

Be radical folks. Remember there are thousands of ancestors that stand beside you.  May you The world needs the radical cycle breakers that lead with love. Be the cycle breakers. Be the ones that revere the ancestors, cultures, stories, and tongues that were nearly forgotten—and do it with gratitude.

For those that came before us, for those that are here now, and for those that will come after us.